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Midwest Bud Lightweight Roundup

by Terminator Ty

Ty's U.S. Midwest Bud Lightweight Roundup

QUICK UPDATE: I don't know if you're checking in on the commentary or not ... everytime I log on to check fight reports, I seem to be having problems ... I don't know if it's game related or Ty related, but it's almost impossible to get anything written for the commentary ... whenever it gets straightened out, whatever it is, I'll get you guys an update ... my apologies, but I appreciate your patience ... I'll try to win you back with something clever (whatever?) ... Ty

Champion Punky Brewster (Drew) vs. Challenger Caesar Lopez (dmdog)

Punky Brewster, 40-19-7 (22/2), gained the title a week ago with an exciting and controversial decision over Oki Husay Irigatak. All three judges gave her the first round when she narrowly outlanded Irigatak 34-30. Then, Punky downed the champion in the ninth round, and took the session, 10-8. Finally, Irigatak was issued a standing 8-count in the 12th, after the challenger - now champion - landed several blows in succession. Punky won 114-112 on two cards and 114-113 on the third. That means each judge had the poster-child for booby-reduction surgery tied or down entering the final round.
"It feels great to be on top," Punky said. "Before my surgery, I was afraid to be on top because of the laws of gravity, but this feels so good."
Irigatak took the opportunity to step down in weight class, and will fight at featherweight.
"I think that woman's chest could fight at bantamweight all by itself," said the unusually witty, Secret Asian Man (manager of Irigatak). "Irigatak must rededicate himself. Our culture fights for pride. This is unacceptable."
One boxing mag reported that Secret Asian Man has threatened to cut a finger from his fighters hand for every loss he takes from this point on. Bud Lightweight readers found this to be cruel and unusual punishment in any culture as one would not be able to handle a 12-ounce cylinder without at least 1 digit on each hand.
At 5-1, 133 pounds, Punky will give up five inches to her challenger Caesar Lopez in this fight. Punky is seven pounds heavier.
"She's chunky and spunky, that Punky," said Lopez, 14-11-3 (4/2) as a pro. He's also 5-1-0 (0/0) in regional title fights. "This is my first bout at lightweight, but the timing was right. I split two brutal battles with Buddy Banger 2, and I'm ready for the kind of attack she'll bring."

No. 2 Big Ratt (ZWIP) vs. Ragner Bergene (Top Rank - U.S. West)

Big Ratt, 26-14-3 (19/5), returns to the lightweight ranks for the first time in a long time. He's not your typical KO artist as he stands at 5-7. It will be Ratt's first fight since losing to current featherweight world champ Niklas Hagman on March 11. Bergene, 4-10, enters with a record of 20-10-1 (17/8).
"Ratt has made a living out of punking chumps like this guy," ZWIP said. "I guess he's a foreign dude or something, but his name sounds too much like Candace Bergman for me to take him too seriously. I'm only putting Ratt in the ring against him, so we can hopefully be in line for another title fight soon."

No. 3 Bonzo Madrid (Gravity Storm) vs. R. Pinguin (Ramstad - Europe)

After starting his career with six consecutive knockouts, Madrid has split his last four fights and is 8-2-0 (7/2). Madrid's punching power will be put to the test against Pinguin, 11-4-0 (0/3). Obviously Pinguin has proven he can take a punch, but at 5-9, 137 pounds, will he have enough to stand up to Madrid's fury.
"Bonzo didn't have quite the snap in his punches last time out," Gravity Storm said. "We tinkered with a few things a couple weeks ago to get a decision win over Kenny Gregory, and he's struggled to get back in the groove. My prediction is that Pinguin don't walk, waddle or crawl out of the ring on Wednesday. They may just bury him in the tux he's wearing."

No. 4 Slavec (Godfather) vs. Viljo (Lamay - Europe)

Slavec (rating 5, status 5) will make his professional debut against one of TBG's best managers. Viljo is 6-1-1 (5/0), so nothing will be easy for either fighter in this one.
"I'm not sure what to expect from my fighter in this one," Godfather said. "Hopefully the fact that he can do just about anything will make it difficult for Viljo to scout us. There's always a chance that his management won't care too much about him, since he's only a 5-rated fighter."

No. 5 Bruiser McDuff (Lightnin) vs. No. 6 Faith "Vampire Slayer" (Drew)

McDuff, 5-1-1 (3/0), hasn't suffered a loss in over a month and has been on a steady rise up the charts. He picked up a key win last week over Reggie Reptile, whose green face paint may have cost him a close decision to McDuff.
Two judges gave the bout to McDuff, 115-113 and 116-113, but another gave it to Reggie, 115-114.
"It shouldn't even have been that close," McDuff said. "I was pumping Iguana's boy (who was 2-0-0 at the time) from every different angle. You should have seen the judges. They were looking like Lou Ferigno or something. Green paint all over their faces. I've never seen anything like it. It's time for TBG to ban Reggie for life and suspend his manager."
"Christy Martin was the only judge who saw that fight right," Reggie's manager, The Iguana, said. "If losing this week wasn't bad enough, I've had 250 different calls for Geico car insurance at the house. He's a Gecko. I'm an Iguana. Come on people."
McDuff will face another fighter on a roll this week. Faith, 4-1-1 (1/0) hasn't lost in her last five bouts. Faith won her last fight (May 14 vs. Angel's Delight), 114-113 on all three cards, after Delight was penalized for holding in a round that she was resting. At any rate, Faith has vowed to win again and to lay a thumping on Bruiser after his accusations that her gym mate, Gabrielle, provided some adult companionship after he defeated her two weeks ago.
"He made her out to be a filthy whore," Faith said. "I was personally offended, as I know that Gabrielle hardly cares for men, let alone scum like him."
"Hey there Faith," Drew said, stepping between his fighter and the microphone. "Let's let our fists do the talking in the ring."

No. 7 Angel's Delight (Bectel) vs. No. 8 Reggie "Regulater" Jhonson (Regger)

These two will take to the ring in a rematch of their fight two weeks ago, which Delight dominated to the tune of 118-110 on all three judges cards. Delight, 20-15-2 (0/6), suffered a narrow 115-113 (x3) defeat to David Sparticus, 5-0-0 (1/0) last week. Sparticus (managed by Boxing Coalition) promptly retired and has all the Midwest region waiting for a shot at him.
Jhonson, 2-5-0 (1/1) since turning pro, picked up a huge KO win last week. Jhonson went allout in five rounds and shocked then undefeated Eric "Maholo" Turner (3-0-0, 0/0) with a huge 12th round. Turner led 105-103 on all the cards entering the 12th, but he already had his left eye swelled shut. Jhonson went allout in the 12th and fixed his right eye to match.
"He's under appreciated as a pro," Jhonson's manager, Regger said. "He's sorta like Allen Iverson or Shawn Kemp. Just because Reggie's out chasing naked girlfriends with weapons or making babies at the local Krispy Kreme, everybody is on his case. Let's just let a great fighter be."
"Great fighter? Are you kidding me?" Angel's Delight told the crowd. "I ran circles around him two weeks ago. I can't even believe his manager would consider putting him in the ring against me again. This is the easiest step up the ladder I've had in a long time."

Tiberius Cannon 2 (ZWIP) vs. Reggie Reptile (Iguana)

Tiberius Cannon, 5-2-1 (2/1), has a rating advantage (3 to 2) over Reggie